IMAGE: MUD JOY, Go! Push Pops Collective @gopushpops, photo: Laura Weyl
“Being fertile is a choice made in the mind first, if your mind is relaxed and focused on achieving a healthy and balanced state, your body will follow!”
– Bailey Rollins, Author of Stay Fertile
Several years ago I was on a yoga retreat when I met full spectrum doula Bailey Rollins. I remember looking at her and asking, as so many have asked me since, “What’s a doula?” After she explained to me that a doula is a guardian and advocate for the Mother during childbirth, I said “You’re going to be mine.” Lucky for me, I was pregnant less than a year later. Bailey Rollins did turn out to be my doula, putting me on to a whole new world of natural fertility and pregnancy. And I am so glad she did.
Not only did Bailey help me have my beautiful son Kali, now seven, she stewarded a dynamic ecstatic birth, taught me a lot along the way and even became a dear friend over time. If you’re looking for a neutral assessment of her new book STAY FERTILE: Health Hacks to Preserve Your Fertility Naturally then I’m hardly the person to ask! If you ask me, neutrality is for the spineless. The feminist and birth justice advocate in me would go so far as to say that neutrality is for the uninformed and disempowered! Neutrality is for a woman, thirty-five years young, that accepts her “geriatric” status within the corporate medical model. Neutrality is for the mid-thirty-something scared into freezing her eggs prematurely. Neutrality is turning a blind eye to systemic racial discrimination disproportionately effecting the maternal health of Black and Brown mothers facing the delivery room. To join efforts with community-based organizations at the frontlines of the maternal morality crisis, I’ve included a list of activist groups HERE. Neutrality is not how I gave natural birth, nor is it how I approach the for-profit corporatization of a women’s birthing experience, what for me, should be a peak spiritual one.
Pregnancy begins the moment we even consider becoming a Mother. It begins with our thoughts about our sexuality, what we eat and who we attract as a partner. Which is why Bailey Rollin’s STAY FERTILE is a must read for any women who is pregnant, trying to become pregnant or considering conceiving. The table of contents alone gives you the down low – Eat organic! Stay hydrated! Practice yoga and meditation! Listen to your gut! Get gluten and dairy free! While most of us may not need to do all of this to conceive, all of us would likely benefit from reading this book and making the lifestyle changes therein. Because it’s not just about getting pregnant – people do that all the time. In fact, too many babies come into this world conceived within the sad auspices of drunken hook-up sex or even less ideal, makeup sex after a fight. Speaking for myself, I found that had I made healthier lifestyle choices earlier on, I would have had a smoother, less physically painful pregnancy, and sadly, would have been more likely to have achieved the natural home birth I set out to have. While successfully battling the hospital system over my natural birth was a triumph, next time around, I want to do it in a dark, quiet, calm, peaceful and yes – orgasmic – frame of mind.
Simplify the overwhelming amount of information on fertility out there, STAY FERTILE’s thoughtful hacks remind us why being a woman is beautiful, powerful and miraculous. This book is for all women that would rather learn to love and trust their body’s rhythms than give their power away to some doctor that would push for a C-section he could schedule around his golf tournament. This book is for all women who are boldly reclaiming the right to give birth naturally, with dignity, without pressure to live up to the status quo or be a nice/good girl.
Maybe you start with simply adding more iron and folate rich foods to your diet – things like spinach, asparagus, tomatoes, mustard greens, romaine lettuce, kidney beans, avocados, Brussel sprouts, papaya, oranges and bananas. As Chapter 3 elaborates, folate plays a huge role in egg quality, regular ovulation and the whole fertilization process. Meanwhile iron rich foods like quinoa, sunflower seeds, dates, tofu, leafy greens and sweet potatoes help women reduce the risk of infertility up to 40%! While this may feel like a no-brainer, having this easy to read e-book right on your phone means you can consult it while doing your grocery shopping. While many of us imbibe virtual infomania, what we often need more than ‘the facts’ is consistent and accessible support, especially while breaking old habits and creating new ones! What many of us need is less information and more rest, quiet, calm and vitality. Which is why this book doesn’t offer quick fixes or cure-alls. Think more superfoods, women’s circles and meditation…less, not more products.
IMAGE: Bailey Rollins STAY FERTILE
Luckily, many of the world’s superfoods – things like omega-3 rich blue-green algae, goji berries and kale – are easier to obtain than ever. But did you know adding superfoods to your diet can save you big money? How many of us are still spending $8-10 on a latte everyday? As Chapter 9 details, not only does caffeine wreak havoc on our fertility, the dairy and sugar in your average coffee drink also takes a hefty toll. I started making lattes at home with antioxidant-rich Matcha powder and Laird Superfood Creamer with Adaptogens, saving hundreds of dollars a year. A Sweet & Creamy non-dairy alternative, this superfood creamer is boosted with four powerful adaptogenic mushrooms. Unlike coffee, adaptogens like cordyceps, maitake, lion’s mane and chaga not only give you an energy boost but help the body respond to stress and support overall well-being. Perfect for homemade lattes, teas, smoothies, baking and more, Laird uses nothing but real-food ingredients and is sweetened with organic coconut sugar. Please note, functional mushrooms / adaptogens are not recommended during pregnancy because they affect your hormones, but Laird offers creamers without as well.
Find it HERE
During my first pregnancy, I had some unexplained skin and gut issues brewing which may have contributed to my pre-term labor and emergency hospital birth. I remember telling my at-home Midwife at the time that I was “Eating healthy,” but I don’t think she believed me. Having struggled with disordered eating for many years prior, from my perspective, I was eating healthy. As healthy as I could at the time, especially given my new intense cravings for cheese and watermelon, what turned out to be two of my son Kali’s favorite foods! Looking back, I think I could have done a better job and that a cleaner diet would have not only have eliminated some of the stress of the hospital birth, but the chronic inflammation I was experiencing as various embarrassing symptoms.
Yes, when you’re pregnant, anything goes! All sorts of weird bodily sensations qualify as ‘normal’ symptoms of pregnancy I would come to find out. But by the same token, everything we put in our body fuels the baby and fuels our experience of birthing it. As STAY FERTILE’s Chapter 14 breaks it down, we must attend to the health of our gut microbiome. While it’s more convenient to address symptoms with over the counter products – there are truly so many, and if you’re strapped like I was during pregnancy, it’s tempting to use the ‘doctor recommended’ ones that insurance pays for. Real talk, many of these cause problems down the line. The more interventions and drugs we imbibe, the further away we get from that happy, healthy, easy birthing experience nature made possible. If you make it to Chapter 26, you’ll find a less popular hack – detoxing your household toiletries.
Covering up your less exquisite body odors? Eradicating dandruff? Bad breath? Smelly pussy? Your body is telling you something, why not listen? Again, when we slow down and attend to the root of the problem – rather than mask a symptom – we pave the way for longterm wellness. Our health is our wealth, and luckily, there are companies out there today tackling gut health from a holistic perspective. Justhuman’s bodycare takes into account that our skin is a living, breathing organism. Barrier to our body’s intricate microbiome, our skin has 800,000 neurons and 200 receptors per square centimeter, absorbing sensory information that passes through our nerve fibers to our brain. Most leading skincare products aren’t biocompatible because they swap biochemicals for sulfates, alcohols and parabens – what not only negatively impact fertility, but destroy the natural bacterial protection provided by our skin. A premier branch of neurocosmetics, JustHuman products utilize pre-, pro-, and post-biotics (three ingredients that happen to naturally live on our skin) to balance rather than deplete the body’s microbiome. Their Probiotic Dandruff Therapy Duo addresses the root cause of dandruff while deeply nourishing and fortifying your hair, creating extra density and leaving you with smooth, shiny locks. Anti-inflammatory and pH balanced, the simple formula treats flakiness and scalp irritation with visible results in 7-days or less.
Find it HERE
Since I’m planning to conceive again, I’ve already started taking a new beyond prenatal vitamin by Nourished. Her Sexual Health nutrient gummies are formulated with a potent blend of essential vitamins like Zinc (known to contribute to normal fertility and reproduction) and Inositol, which studies show can enhance ovulation rates. Sugar-free and vegan, the gummies are available by monthly subscription and are not only designed to support women’s sexual health, but have added Vitamin C and Vitamin B12 to improve energy levels along with 200mg 5-HTP – a naturally occurring amino acid used to aid your body’s production of feel-good hormone serotonin. Rollins writes in her book that women who take prenatal vitamins BEFORE conception lower their risk of preterm labor, neural tube defects and heart issues in babies.
Find it HERE
Lastly, I just want to put some extra emphasis on the peace and bliss front. Because whether this information is brand new or simply a good reminder, knowing that everyday household products are contributing to rising rates of infertility is probably enough to make many of us feel violated, overwhelmed and at high risk for becoming casualties of myriad widespread (but sadly normalized) health epidemics. I mean, halfway through writing this article I took a closer look at my hair detangled and found its full of parabens! The detox continues! Now I’m using simply Macadamia Natural Oil by Macadamia Beauty. A pioneer of oil-based hair repair, natural oil addresses breakage, frizz, damage and dryness, without ladling on the toxic chemicals. Think silky, shiny and healthy-looking hair after just one use, not to mention bathing your locks in a rich blend of Omega 3, 6, 7 and 9 fatty acids. Created by a 25-year veteran of the salon industry, Macadamia products are sulfate-free, paraben-free, phthalate-free and color-safe. Their signature blend of Macadamia Oil, Argan Oil and Vitamin E is also the perfect after-swim solution.
Find it HERE
It may be very popular these days to get your bliss on at the yoga shala, but are you taking the yoga off the mat? Yoga prepares the body for meditation and trains our nervous system to recover quickly from trauma. The problem is many of us are living in nervous system overextension, re-traumatizing ourselves on the daily as we appear to be ‘keeping up’ with the rapid pace of techno-capitalism. This too, is a huge fertility killer!
What I needed more than anything during my pre-conception and pregnancy period was some time off. When my son came a month early, I remember thinking that it was probably because I was habitually early, nervous and working overtime toward some elusive goal that I never achieved (being happy, having enough money, getting love, etc.) If I had slowed down long enough, I truly think that I would have found that I had many of the things I was striving for already. Meditation teaches us this, if we develop the discipline necessary to make a regular practice of it. What I also found is that the stress of carrying a baby only magnifies other weak points in the body. The chronic neck pain I had experienced since my overachieving high school days only became more acute as the pregnancy progressed. Once I was carrying the live human baby on my back, the pain expanded. Set in place your natural antidotes to everyday stress before you get knocked up – trust me – yoga becomes A LOT harder once you have a baby screaming for Mama all day and night.
If you aren’t able to go to the spa regularly, as most of us aren’t, fill your pantry with aromatherapeutic tools! I like Whispering Willow’s Lavender & Flax Seed Neck Wrap. Filled with organic flax seeds and lavender flowers, heat the wrap to ease tension and tightness in your neck, shoulders, and back or alternatively, cool the wrap to aid sore muscles. Available in tranquil gray, deep blue and secret forest, you’re future progeny will only benefit from having a Mother that made her ease top priority.
Find it HERE
When you’re on the go, I recommend packing an assortment of roll-on essential oils. Not only do most popular fragrances pack stealthy endocrine disruptors called phthalates (linked to diabetes, liver and breast cancer as well as infertility) they negatively impact the calm of our nervous system. Elevating any self-care routine to the max, essential oils however, a unique facet of Ayurveda’s Ancient yogic science, ground the physical body by stimulating the sensory body. Natural plant-based aromas have been used as medicine for centuries as they have a subtle, yet extremely powerful influence on our mind and body. Aromatherapy can be used to protect prana, regulate digestion/metabolism and boost immunity.
If you haven’t yet dialed in your signature scent, tryout the Natural Wellness Gift Set by K Sahai. Each roll-on is made with premium essential oils and expertly formulated to address specific needs such as: De-Stress (Jojoba oil, Ylang Ylang, Lavender, and Frankincense); Breathe (Eucalyptus, Black Pepper, Ravensara, Jojoba Oil); Muscle Ease (Jojoba, Juniper, Myrrh, Ginger, Helichrysum); Sleep (Lavender, cedarwood, chamomile); Headache (Lavender, Peppermint, Jojoba); Focus (Jojoba Oil, Rosemary, Peppermint, Frankincense) and Detox (Jojoba Oil, Geranium, Cardamom). Housed in a sleek and portable glass bottle, simply inhale deeply after application and chillax!
Find it HERE
About Bailey Rollins, Author of STAY FERTILE
Bailey Rollins is a fertility doula, pregnancy coach and birth and postpartum doula based in New York City. As a hypno fertility practitioner, she helps individuals leverage the mind-body connection to create optimal conditions for a successful IUI or IVF round and healthy pregnancy. She is honored to provide much-needed holistic support to women and their partners undergoing fertility treatments. To schedule a free initial consultation to see if fertility doula support is right for you, you can email her at fertilebliss.coaching@gmail.com
Get her Book HERE
